Growing into my own skin.

Random thoughts in 3...2...1...

It's been a rough couple of months.  Is it possible to have an emotional growth spurt?  These past weeks I've felt unsure, irritable and just in a funk.  I'm loving my life one minute and daydreaming about a past that didn't happen another.  Maybe I'm going nuts.

Because if I'm truly honest with myself, I am happy.  I just need to see that more often.  To concentrate on what I'm lucky enough to have and not what I can have or want for the future.  Just live in the moment.  Slow down and enjoy it.

I've kicked myself in the butt and decided I'm going to be a full fledged grown-up from now on.  I've taken on doing the dishes every most nights and attempting to keep the house in order.  I'm assuming the child rearing responsibilities while Mr. Penguin is busy working all hours to support us.  I'm tired, but I'm also so proud of what I've been doing.  I've gained a bigger sense of pride in our home.  An unexpected side effect, but a wonderful mood booster.  To be happy while vacuuming or cleaning the yard...odd.

In taking it slow I'm also attempting to strip our lives of STUFF.  To have each other and the memories we make.  I want a nice home, sure, but I want MORE than that.

Our debt is the first of many things we're conquering.  Once gone I can't even imagine the feelings we'll have.  I'm giddy just sitting here thinking about RRSP's, GIC's, investments and savings accounts. 

...I may have been dropped on my head as a child... 

But seriously, to have the funds to plan our retirement!  Wow.  Totally amazing.  And I want to get on it and pack it full of all the things we want to do paired with all the time we'll have to just be us - together. 

There I go planning in the future again!! It's going to be harder to slow down than I thought...

*hugs*